Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Things that make me want to kill #2

I forgot to add.

Some fucking asshole stole my bike seat and post last week. 
I suppose I should be thankful that they didn't steal my handle bars, front wheel and pedals at the same time.

The latest installment in this comedy/tragedy. 




TLC Update 4 & 5?

Signs of trouble? 
When you don't have the words anymore, when things seem to fall away - words, desires, the elements of an everyday routine of life, when you want the sleeping unconsciousness to cross over into reality...I think it's a dark line of storm clouds on the horizon. 

I want to add also - do NOT ever buy the Chocolate Creme flavour of the Cod Liver Oil/Butter Oil. I have only met with a few things that were more disgusting than this and off the top of my head I come up with: 

freshly boiled larvae piled in great heaping piles in South Korea
stinky tofu in Taipei markets
shit

and I didn't ever taste any of those things but this Chocolate Creme flavour is absolutely incredibly revolting. I am tempted to chuck the whole bottle were it not for how expensive it is. 

So, I guess I am trying to say that I have not been too good with taking the Omega 3 supplement lately, although some days I make myself take a great heaping teaspoonful to get rid of this bottle. 

Well, I find I do have things to say after all even if it is only criticism. 









Wednesday, May 23, 2012

The Ortlieb/Tubus/Cannondale Love-Hate Triangle

I usually cycle to work but for about two months now, I've been tramming it or (rarely, walking) because I've had to put away my Crumpler bag which was giving my neck and shoulder hell. 

I have a Cannondale Quick Feminine 3 which I bought two years ago. 

I ordered some Ortlieb back roller panniers and a Tubus Logos rear rack from www.probikekit.com. (I'm plugging them because they had free shipping to Australia!)

Easy, right?
Should be straightforward, yes? 

Not so fast......here we enter into a tangled comedy of errors which is a recurring motif in my life. 

Turns out that that roundstays are way, waaaaay too short for my Cannondale. I don't understand this. I've got the shortest little legs and my bike is perfect for a petite person like me. How is it that the supplied roundstays (apparently 240mm long) are too short

So off I go trawling throught the internet. Thankfully, Tubus supplies different lengths of roundstays. After getting a ruler, I decided that the 350mm length would fit (the longest one they have!!)
Turns out that my delightful probikekit.com does not sell these roundstays, damn it. 
Turns out very few online bike stores do. 

I ordered one from another UK website which did not have free shipping. I justified the AUD$15 shipping cost by ordering some other cycling bits and bobs. 
Turns out that this website which does not clearly state this, ordering 1 Tubus Roundstay 350mm literally means ONE and not ONE PAIR. 

How the fuck was I supposed to know? Even Tubus gave me two roundstays with the rear rack and who the hell needs just one? I guess somehow I managed to ignore the fact that the picture on the website was of just one roundstay but damn it, that's near subliminal information, it's not explicit enough!

Imagine me ripping into the parcel and the look on my face as I find one and only one roundstay. I even turned the box upside down to look for the other one.

I wrote the store an email saying it would be helpful if you could maybe write somewhere that this does not come as a pair. I recieved no reply back which was why I decided to order from a different cycling store.  It's all about the customer service Cycle Sports UK...  Even a sorry about that, we'll take it into consideration would have made me a repeat customer and I would have bitten the bullet with another $15 shipping cost but nothing? Meh.....

I am now waiting for that one roundstay (for the want of a nail....), and an Ortlieb pannier carry system. Heck, I had to justify the US$25 postage cost somehow.

To be continued.....















TLC Update #4 or, A life of quiet desperation.

Late again. 
My Virgin mobile broadband has finally kicked in. 


As for The Depression Cure program, I'm afraid it's a case of one step forward, one step back. 


Physical Exercise: 0 (yes, 0!)
Sunlight Exposure: Started the Philips goLite Blu finally in the morning for 15 minutes when I wake up.
Omega 3 Fats: I've been keeping up the 1/2 tsp twice daily and have finished the bottle. I think with the next bottle, I'll increase it by another 1/2 tsp a day as I haven't really noticed any physical benefits.
Social Support: Started therapy.


Sleep: ?
Engaging activity:?



I have to be honest. 
I still haven't read through the book. I've avoided it. I've skimmed it. I tend to do that. Be incomplete with things. Half-assed if you like. 


I've stood on the threshold of a lot of things, shiny new opportunities, and for most of them, I've turned and gone back into the same tiny little black box of a room that I longed to escape from. 


Starting therapy. Well, I've only been hanging on to that referral from my GP since the end of last year and I've probably needed therapy since I was 12. I guess you can see it as a big step forward.
It's also my last hope for change. I've played the last ace up my sleeve. I don't know if therapy will work. Maybe I won't like this therapist. I know I need to stop running from myself and maybe this therapist can help me do that because I can't help myself. I really can't. I've broken my heart trying. It's most decidedly erosive to your soul to not only be continuously disappointed in yourself but to also see the disappointment in the eyes of those around you as they slowly realise........you're a failure


Life at 32 isn't what I thought it would be like when I was 12, or even 20.  
I never thought it'd be about just getting by. 


Maybe therapy will be about becoming ok with that. 
That's fine. Really. 
Because the alternative is to continue as I have done and I know where that road will lead eventually. 



































Friday, May 18, 2012

Philips goLITE BLU




Finally recieved the Philips goLITE BLU HF3321 yesterday and tried a 'dose' this morning. 
The instructions recommend 15 minutes at the medium setting initally. 

First Impressions:
Light, flimsy build quality for the price. (I mean c'mon, over $100 for this?) 
The gadget has a hollow plastic box feel in your hands. (Well, essentially it is nothing more than a glorified lamp, LED lights.....and not much else)
It really bugs me that I hear a continuous, high pitched 'tiny' electronic noise when this is turned on, and the sounds becomes higher with each increase in light intensity. 


















Things that calm me down...

















Things that make me want to kill...

Leafblowers for 3 hours straight every single Friday morning



Wednesday, May 16, 2012

TLC Update #3

I'm a few days late with the Sunday update because oops, I've done it again. Used up all 10 gb of data a mere two weeks after the turnover date. I'm not even some hotshot blogger. What the heck?


Physical Exercise
I went to the gym 3 times
Yoga + swimming
Cycling
Kinesis class aka legal torture machines


Sunlight Exposure
Still waiting for the damn light box from the ebay store but sat out in the sun at a cafe a few times.


Dietary Omega 3 Fatty Acids
Continued with the CLO/BO doses. Is it too soon to expect it to make a difference?


Social Support
I finally made a counselling appointment for this Friday. Does this count?


Sleep
Engaging Activity
I haven't gotten this far yet. 











Monday, May 7, 2012

Sunday, May 6, 2012

TLC Update #2

I'm having a hellish time. 
I don't know if I'm awakening to the truth, -withdrawing the veil of denial from my eyes or whether I'm becoming blinded by what I think and feel and heading into deeper waters.

Whatever it is, it was sudden and I can pinpoint the moment my mood took a sharp downturn. It precipitated by some rather petty and malicious remarks by a group of doctors at a cafe where my friend and I had been having coffee. I hadn't heard anything but my friend did and she told me what they had said after they left. My friend and I are nurses. She told me that one of the doctors had been bitching about the nurses where he had been working and he had said at one point, -The nurse told me the urine was cloudy but I hadn't seen it. Why should I believe anything they say? 
I felt as if I had been punched and knocked down without warning. The lack of respect that is the basis of that mindset is unbelievable. 

Hey dickhead, I don't tell you something because I like to create more work for you. In fact, telling you something about the patient's urine means.....guess what? More work for me! Yay, work!! We tell you stuff about the patient because we care about the patient and because it's our registration on the line if we don't report anything to you, the jackass with the degree, in a timely manner. Why don't you go do our job then if you don't trust what we tell you? 

So encountering that shithead and his cohort (neither of his fellow doctors at the table demurred at his comments and surely, they knew we were nurse down the other end of the table because my friend and I were talking shop -not bitching about doctors as a matter of fact) made me realise, -wow, that's what doctors think about nurse and nursing huh? I always suspected it and now I know it's true. 

Thanks for the reality check. I think I'll look for another job since I'd rather make coffee for appreciative people for the rest of my life rather than be the annoying and stupid nurse who bothers doctors over stupid things. You sure didn't become a doctor because of your innate thoughtfulness and kindness did you? You only have brains going for you really. Good luck with that.

I hate my job. My personality and the job are misaligned. Also, why would I want to keep working in a profession where I keep getting shit from patients and their families and doctors? I need something else from a job. Creativity. You can't be creative as a nurse. You either do something in a very specific way at a very specific time or you don't.  I'm quite inventive in the ways I devised to get patients to take their tablets or food but there is no creativity. There is no happiness and ease in what I do. I am conscientious about the work but I feel so worn down and completely joyless everyday. 

I don't look forward to each day and I can't see anything past this grindingly slow agony of living. 

______________________________________________________________________

TLC #2?

No exercise this week at all. 
BO/CLO all week, 1/2 tsp twice daily except once when I took 1tsp all at once.
Haven't read the book either.
The only new thing I've done is purchase from ebay a Philips goLite Blu Energy Light HF3321/60 to start light therapy.

I think I also need to start counselling or I am going to be up the creek without a paddle very soon. 

Sunday, April 29, 2012

TLC Update Sunday #1

I've decided to start a weekly Sunday update/audit/review of how well I followed the Therapeutic Lifestyle Change (TLC) program from The Depression Cure book by Dr. Illardi

This is only a partial update as I only started reading the book last week. 

Omega 3 Fatty Acids

Last Thursday (April 26th), I recieved the Green Pastures Blue Ice Royal Butter Oil and Fermented Cod Liver Oil (BO/CLO for short) blend; 3 of the Cinnamon Tingle and 1 of the Chocolate Cream. 








I recieved the Ohhira Professional Probiotic capsules (OPP) I ordered about a day before. I know this isn't an omega 3 fatty acid but my mother was told by a doctor when I was a baby that I did not have enough healthy gut flora and so I needed to take probiotics.


As an aside and for semi-scientific purposes, I am currently only taking the BO/CLO and OPP and Zyflammend. No extra Vit-D, no green-lipped mussel extract, no EPO, CoQ10....well you get the picture. 

So far I've taken 8 doses of Green Pastures BO/CLO, 1/2 tsp morning and night and I've taken 10 capsules of the OPP. 

I found the BO/CLO in Cinnamon Tingle surprisingly easy to take. I put the bottle in the fridge where it solidified into a warm brown colored paste. I scoop it up with a 1/2 tsp measuring spoon and scrape it against the side to level it and because it is so small and soft, it goes down whole easily especially when I follow it with a swig of milk which I swish around my mouth to remove any lingering oils on my tongue.
Occasionally, I have had a rather rank whiff or taste around my lips if I haven't been careful not to touch it with my lips but more often than not, I find it faintly and pleasantly cinnamony.




Mmmmmm....yummy


I hope the Chocolate Cream proves as nice. 

How did I choose Green Pastures? 
I read a blog article http://beautyeditor.ca/2010/09/02/the-single-best-product-evah-for-your-skin-is-not-in-fact-an-actual-skincare-product/ where the author wrote about the positive effect this product had on her skin. As I had been experiencing a very similar crisis to hers (I had also tried the Oil Cleansing Method and my chin and cheeks had exploded into a disfiguring cystic pimply rash and I was desperate to try anything that would heal my skin fast). 


It's too early to comment on any mental aspects but I will continue taking 1 tsp daily for 1 month and then try increasing it to 1 1/2 tsp daily.

To me, some downsides: 
Green Pastures touts the fact that they are only naturally fermented cod liver oil product on the market and being naturally fermented, they can only give approximate figures on how much DHA and EPA are contained in each serving. So I am not sure if I am getting enough DHA/EPA in the right rations as per Dr. Illardi's book. 

Some of the blurb on the bottle and website just sounds downright hokey and full of New Age earnestness. 
I mean listen to this:

HISTORICALLY SACRED FOOD
During his travels around the world, Dr. Weston A. Price came across cultures that were strong of mind, body, and spirit; he noticed the relationship between their extraordinary well-being and the sacred and natural foods they consumed. 

Uh-huh, yeah, sure. Do you mean the native people of this world who in almost every single country have the highest levels of infant mortality and highest rates of diabetes, heart disease and renal failure and overwhelming social issues with drug and alcohol abuse? Maybe Dr. Weston encountered cultures that hadn't been touched by western culture, way back when....


Lastly, the expense but I would rather keep buying this if it works rather than an antidepressant.

So it's been about four days and I haven't noticed anything great happening with my skin. In fact, it's kind of getting worse. Still breaking out with fresh pimples, still that awful blotchy red-purple post-acne scarring everywhere....

The OPP is harder to take despite being conveniently encapsuled and not needing to be refrigerated because the capsules are meant to be taken an hour before food or an hour and a half after food. 
As I believe Jeffrey Steingarten, bon vivant, and writer of The Man Who Ate Everything noted when he had to take some medication with similar rules, that he found it terribly difficult to take because his stomach was rarely empty. I am much the same. 
As soon as I am awake, I like to eat otherwise I get strong stomach pains that persist much like colic if I don't head it off in time and I am too distracted an hour and a half to remember to take it. I suppose I should try.

I have been trying to take the capsule as soon as I wake up and then have a lie down in bed for another half an hour and distract myself with ablutions for the next fifteen minutes so that the capsule has had at least forty-five minutes to make its way down. 

Exercise
Today I walked home from work. That took about 30 minutes and that is pretty much the only exercise I did all week.

As for:
sunlight exposure
engaging activity
social support
sleep

I still need to read those chapters.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Here's hoping...The Depression Cure by Dr Steve Ilardi

This is going to be an ongoing post where I read and follow the book and blog about my experiences. 

So...honesty time. 
I do have depression. I've had it for more than half my life and so I don't know where I begin and depression ends. Who could I have been without this depression? I wonder all the time. I am reminded of a tree that used to grow near my home when I was a child. It grew so closely next to a chain link fence that after about a foot of growing alone, the trunk pressed against and eventually enveloped a part of the chain links. I would stare at this section, wondering if it hurt the tree very much. The tree grew away from the fence eventually when the fence ended and likewise, I hope also to grow away from this depression. 

To give an idea of how I am affected...
I wish almost every day that I wasn't alive. 

But I do live, everyday, only myself knowing. Is this courage? Is this stupidity? Just plain dumb animal living? Eating, drinking, excreting. It's all I can do sometimes. 

I know that the pain of living never ends. I brace myself, knowing that the death of my mother, father, brother will come, three devastating blows yet to come, and one day myself. I know we all die alone. I know it everyday. 

I know the pain of being old and alone already because I am young and alone now. 

Sometimes, I just want life to be over and done with and yet sometimes, I am angry that this is all I want and I want to believe that I can have a good life, a fulfilling life despite the sorrows yet to come. 


So onto the book. 

The author of this book pretty much promises that his Therapeutic Lifestyle Change (TLC) program will if not cure, at least alleviate depression. 

There are six components:

omega-3 fatty acids
engaging activity
physical exercise
sunlight exposure
social connections
enhanced sleep

I am open to trying this program because as Dr. Ilardi points out in his book and as I well know, antidepressant medications aren't all that effective. 

The downside to this program is that one must be at a certain level of depression i.e. not the paralysed with depression stage in order to be able to start and keep going with this program.

I think that the only thing that can brick this for me is that I know I tend to give up just like that, out of the blue. Self-sabotage issues, I know. I do plan on working on this with a therapist but for now, I want to focus on moving out of my crappy flat where there are pigeons living in the bathroom. 

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Somehow...

I burned through 10G of data from my internet mobile broadband in less than 3 weeks. 
And because Virgin makes their customers have TWO logins (how completely stupid is that?), one for billing services and another for data/webmail, duh.....of course I've forgotten my data login password and login name. 


Truly, I haven't downloaded any movies/music/filthy pictures.....at least having that on my computer might make having used up 10 whole gigabytes of data allowance worthwhile but I've got nothing tangible other than some blog posts to show for it.


I've purchased an extra 1G to tide me over. I can't live without the net.


Well, I'm going on about how annoyed I am because I also can't seem to log into my Vodafone mobile phone account either. I've forgotten that password too. 


What else? I've forgotten my phone banking information from ANZ as well!


I guess I better really add some fish oils to my little pharmacy. 


Today I didn't get run over by a car -- I got bumped which is still really infuriating. The car was close to the road but motionless long enough so that as I was walking along the footpath, I crossed in front of her to get to the other side and as I was in front of her, the woman drove towards me and pushed me with the car. She could not have not seen me as I was right in front of the drivers side and she had to drive a few feet to get to where I was. I banged on her bonnet twice hard and shouted at her. As I walked past and turned to see who it was, I could see a woman in professional clothing (striped shirt) in sunglassses, yelling back and waving her arms at me. 


I'm not above hoping that woman has a really bad day and actually, I hope she has a crappy life. Anyone who yells at the person they could have injured, are scum and I hope bad things happen to them. 


Let's see what I've been up to:


Ordered some bike stuff -Ortlieb back panniers, and a rear bike rack. I've calculated that I need to cycle to work and into the city between 36-74 times to break even. Even less if I can sell my awful Crumpler bag. What?! Yes! I hate Crumpler okay?! I know it's an iconic bag. I know 1 in 3 Melbournites have them. I don't care! They make my neck and shoulder hurt. I finally figured out why my left shoulder hurts all the time. It's because I use my bleeding Crumpler all the time and since I've stopped, my shoulder is better. Q.E.D


Ordered Liteneasy 7 day meal plan 1500 cal to start next Tuesday. I need to lose weight. It only hit home when I automatically started knitting a sweater for myself in the small size. Finished the body, started on one sleeve, tried it on and realised to my horror that I looked like I had squeezed into a wetsuit and I just bulged in all directions. I know all about unhealthy waist proportions and I've got one. I'd like to keep going until I lose 5kg then hopefully by then, I can get the hang of approximate portion sizing.


Went to a cycle class tonight at the Virgin Active gym on Bourke which will be the last time I go to the cycle class there. The instructors turn the music on so loud that I can't hear what they are saying and when I go home, I hear a continuous high pitched keening in my ears as if I'd been out clubbing. It's not just the cycle classes either, it's the dance class, etc...I love cycle classes but I love my hearing more. I've already given them that feedback and I suppose they've chosen to ignore it. Well, since the Carlton YMCA is back on later this year after their massive renovations, that's where I'll go back to. 
On second thought, I do have earplugs but that's ridiculous. 
I miss the fantastic cycle class instructor I had at the Fernwood gym in Newtown (NSW). She was brilliant, - gave clear instructions, reinforced good posture always, was encouraging and had an inspiringly hot bod too. 


Went to a skin clinic to have the apocalyptic eruptions on my chin treated. It is not just one deep painful cystic acne, there are four as well as twenty acne pustules all on my little chinny chin chin. Truly revolting.
Came away with a serum (as I expected), underwent an LED light therapy session and an appointment for next week. I'm praying this helps. 

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

the WHO and the WHY

So I suppose even if this blog is really for my own pleasure and as an aide-memoire for my old age, and well, my current age, I should perhaps write a bit about myself. 


I have no particular connection with the Daintree Rainforest in Queensland, Australia as some people have asked when I give out my email address. I've never been there. I had to pick an email name and I happened to read a Readers Digest article about the rainforest in Qld earlier and since then I've used the daintree name liberally in my internet life. Did I just give a clue for hackers? Oh crap. 


Out of curiosity, I looked up the name Daintree just now. Is it Aboriginal? Such an unusual word. No. It is a surname and the rainforest is named after a Richard Daintree. To quote:


This uncommon name is of Anglo-Saxon origin, and a locational surname deriving from the place called Daventry in Northamptonshire; the surname, found as Daintree, Daintrey and Daintry, represents the accepted local pronunciation of the placename. Daventry is recorded in the Domesday Book of 1086 as "Daventrei", and in the 1199 Feet of Fines of the county as "Dauintre", and the name means "Dafa's tree", derived from the Olde English pre 7th Century personal name "Dafa" (perhaps from the verb "gedafen", fitting), with "treow", tree. Locational surnames, such as this, were acquired by the lord of the manor, and local landowners, and especially by those former inhabitants who had moved to another area, and were thereafter best identified by the name of their birthplace.

Read more: http://www.surnamedb.com/Surname/Daintree#ixzz1sDiud2pq



Wiki and I'm not afraid to use it, says that the Daintree rainforest is and this makes me smile, an Important Bird Area, IBA for short and contains 18% of Australia's bird species. 


So, I am indeed 'after 30' and I live in Melbourne, Australia. I would like to talk about my job but for privacy reasons, I can't but suffice it to say that I work in a long suffering health profession, and I would like to GET OUT! But don't worry folks in Melbourne-land and beyond, you're in safe hands with me. I'm a conscientious worker. 


I don't have a particular focus for this blog. I mean I'm not passionate about food, makeup, coffees, or travelling. I might throw in a few reviews. I started writing simply because I forget. I forget a lot and it started to worry at me that I look back and all I remember is either the bad/embarassing or sad. I mean there's been a lot of sad but I want to remember the good, the funny, the happy. Maybe writing about my life will help me live more consciously. An examined life. 


I am supremely terrified that I will be the same person in 10 years. 


An origin story, the focus of this blog, my fears. That's a good enough introduction for now.  

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Library Haul #3

From the Melbourne City Library.




An unexpected day off due to my mildly incompetent manager but a welcomed one.
I woke up exhausted. I always do.


DVD:
Heartbreaker
Amelie

CD:
5:55

Books:
Digital SLR All-in-One For Dummies
Swiss Watching by Diccon Bewes


A quick review of Swiss Watching:


I pounced on Swiss Watching with excitement because for quite awhile, in the back of my mind, I'd been pondering on the fact that Switzerland is a country you never hear about in the news. An enigmatic beautiful country. Also, another strange thing is that I've never met a Swiss person. 


This book immediately brought to mind how important font is. The font of this book does not make me take it seriously. I can't explain it. I know that sounds stupid but the overall impression is that the font trivialises the writing of the book. It dumbs it down for me. There is a cute nugget of a sentence. 'And, after all, pineapple and coconut together make a great pina colada. ' but I just shrugged mentally but then immediately wondered if I would have appreciated it more if it were presented to me in a different setting. 


In the end, the book didn't quite grab and hold my interest. I flipped through it rather quickly.The font had a small part in that but mostly I found the writing would have better suited perhaps a travel magazine. 

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Library Haul #2

Or maybe my little toenails have stayed the same size while my feet have grown. 
No, that doesn't make sense. 


Another trip to the library. Melbourne City Library.






DVD: 
The Hedghog

CD:
Highlander's Farewell (Alasdair Fraser, Natalie Haas)
Flight of the Concords

Books:
Talk Dirty French by Alexis Munier
The Depression Cure by Dr Steve Ilardi


No cookbooks I hope you realise. It was hard but I managed it!


I'm listening to Highlander's Farewell as I type. 
I love Celtic music. The strongly rhythmic music soothes me and I find anything with cello in it deeply satisfying.


Some offhand reviews:
The Hedghog
I read the book and couldn't get into it because of the grating hint of self-conscious pretentiousness and I also hated the ending.  So I already knew the ending of the movie which I still hated but on the whole I found the movie absorbing due to the beautifully innocent and melancholy performance of Garance Le Guillermic who played Paloma. 


Wait...do I hear echos of The Piano theme on track 8 Gloomy Winter's Noo Awa' ?


I really thought they could have filled out Renee's background a little more as wonderful as Paloma was. 


Here's a 'dirty' french word picked at random for your pleasure. 


ne plus se sentir pisser
to be walking on air, lit. to not feel oneself pee


Now I'll be on the lookout in the french films I've borrowed. 


P.S The really really dirty words are all at the back. Whoo boy. 

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

When did.....

my little toe nails start shrinking? 


Sunday, April 1, 2012

Hello, my name is Ellie

and I am a vitamins and supplements addict. 


To fully confess my addiction, I give the complete list:


Nature's Own Mega B 150
- for moods and brain function
Swisse Vitamin D
- I have low Vit D
Bioglan Superflex Pain Ease (chondroiton &MSM)
- post motorcycle accident (2 years ago)
Healthy  Care CoQ10
- for energy 
Ostevit-D & Calcium
- to prevent osteoporosis
Blooms Evening Primrose Oil
-for the moods
Blooms Green Lipped Mussel
-to treat left scapula pain
Microgenics Cranberry 17,000 Complex
- for women stuff
Korean Ginseng Syrup
-to have more energy?
NewChapter Zyflament softgels 
-for a healthy inflammation response 


In fact, I've even ordered more online recently.


Green Pastures Blue Ice Royal Butter oil and Fermented Cod Liver Oil Blend

Ohhira's Professional Probiotics


To my shame,  I don't take any of what I have regularly.  Instead,  I throw a handful of tablets and capsules down my throat every once in a blue moon which does me as much good as say, having a brief glimpse of a really gorgeous man walking on the opposite side of the road, and going the other way. 


The trouble is, they all sound really good to me. A healthy inflammation response -hell yeah! I want that. I also want my left scapula to stop aching, therefore, the green lipped mussel and the Bioglan. I don't want the mood swings every month, hence, the EPO, vitamin D, and vitamin B complex.  I want better skin, better digestion, more energy, less pain...it's amazing actually, what those pills, tablets and capsules all promise. 


Ask me another time about my self-help book collection. Oh, boy..